Top 10 WORST Marriage Proposal Fails!
Love is in the air, and when people are in love, they can do some pretty ridiculous things. Case and point, these 10 marriage proposals, which teeter from completely thoughtless to absolute disasters! Sure, a few of these may have worked, but potential suiters take note – most women likely wouldn’t want to remember these proposals.
You know what women love? Letting them believe that you’re dead. It’s an absolute turn-on, so one would automatically assume it’s the best time to pop the question… right? There were surprisingly a few of these to choose from, but the most drastic comes from Alexey Bykov, a Russian man who went the whole 9 yards and hired a screenwriter, director, stuntman, and make-up artist. Why did he hire them, exactly? To stage a scene in which his girlfriend would arrive, see his broken, bloody and seemingly dead body near a car crash, and then be proposed to by said corpse. The real kicker? She said “Yes”, and something tells us that they will be perfect together.
Live TV Rejection
What’s worse than bombing your proposal in front of 150 people? Doing so on a television broadcast which also happens to be in front of a live audience. Mike stumbles through his intentions, mentioning their months long relationship and claiming that it’s “the season”, which we’re still trying to decipher. Mike continues his awkward display by kneeling in front of his girl, Lynn, and popping the question. Luckily for him, she handles it with tact and avoids making the scene far worse, simply asking to discuss it with him later. Today’s lesson? Know your significant other better before attempting a public proposal.
An Unfunny Proposal
It’s tough enough being a comedian and having to work a crowd, but to then try to work a proposal into your act? That’s a recipe for disaster – and for political satirist Tim Young, disaster hit him right in the feels when he attempted to propose to his girlfriend, Sarah, at the start of one of his acts on January 25th, 2012. After Tim brings Sarah on stage, the aforementioned disaster steamrolls him when he pulls out the ring and gets on his knee, inciting a muffled conversation between the two. After Sarah runs off, Tim is left, as most men are in public rejections, trying to put together the pieces of what just happened. Probably the worst part, is when Tim says... Yeaaaaah.. sorry Tim.. We're not laughing at you, we're laughing with you.
The Bloomin’ Proposal
If you’re worried about the ring fitting your loved-one’s finger, sliding it over a strand of Outback’s Bloomin’ Onion should definitely grease it up enough to make it fit. We’re not entirely sure if the photo was staged as a marketing opportunity for Outback’s Twitter feed or if Brandon had really asked the waitstaff to slip the ring around an onion, but really, neither situation negates the fact that he proposed over a Bloomin’ Onion! From the looks of the flower of fried onions, nobody seemed too sad to not dive in, so we’re also assuming she said yes.
Food Court Fail
He had everything planned perfectly. Right in front of the Cinnabon they met at one year prior, he dropped to one knee, his blue jeans going so nicely with his over-dressed upper half. As he explains exactly what it is he loves about his beau, her face begins to flush – probably from the crowd of food court strangers that halt dining on fast food’s finest to gather round and witness what is the coming disaster. One acoustic rendition of “Sweet Caroline” later, he pops the question… and she bolts away from the scene as if realizing how badly she had to pee. Heartbreak and hamburgers, this proposal had it all.
Road Sign Proposal
For the man that doesn’t know how to pop the question, there’s the road sign proposal! There seem to be a few issues that come with the road sign proposal, the first of which being that there doesn’t seem to be a shoulder safe enough to pull over and celebrate on. On the flip side, should the question be posed to the passenger, it sort of pressures them into saying yes. Would you want to be sitting shotgun to someone whose heart you just smashed into a million pieces? Ever wondered what it would feel like to crash into a tree at full speed? Us either.
Check “Yes” or “No”
There are a few things not quite right about posing your nuptials request with a window-marker on yours or their vehicle. Writing it on their window allows them the chance to erase it and go on their merry way. Writing it on your window sets you up for awkward situations… such as if they nonchalantly mark off “No”. When it comes to the completely personal and intimate nature of the proposal, writing it on a vehicle completely negates that… in fact, it’s probably the least intimate means of proposing. Anyone could answer the question for you – and judging by the different color marker, it’s possible that some neighbor probably did.
Church’s Chicken may not have the finesse of a 5-star restaurant, but that shouldn’t stop anyone from utilizing the joint’s alphabet sign to pop the question… right? Pushing our judgments about fast food proposals aside, we have to wonder what the plan would have been had Shineka decided she wanted Burger King that night. Or, if this is a case of employee-on-employee relations; how awkward of a conversation that would have been at the fryer had she said no. It certainly gets points for creativity… and then immediately loses them for making it impossible for us to know what specials may be running. I mean, come on. We demand to speak to the manager and be comp'd a free meal. On second thought, give us a liter of gravy and we'll call it good.
Pepperoni and Love
As impressive - and likely time consuming - as it was that the chef took the time to cut each individual letter out of what looks like pepperoni, we can’t help but assume he was laughing the entire time. Food proposals can be cute, like when the ring is conspicuously placed in a glass of champagne, but using a nice saucy pie to ask what some men and women believe to be the most important question in a relationship… well... that’s just cheesy. Pun totally intended and we are not the least bit sorry.
It’s not necessarily a bad idea to combine your two loves into what is meant to be an intimate occasion, but when one of those loves happens to be what looks like a sad McDonald’s chicken sandwich, it may not have a place in a romantic scenario. Nevertheless, Dennis must be in tune with Ann enough to know that mayonnaise and grease would go perfectly with his proposal. Whether or not the ring being jammed into the bun was staged for the photograph, we may never know, but it’s definitely the perfect start to this McMarriage.